Re-Opening Old Wounds
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Having Robb break his back for the second time is an emotionally complex thing. In addition to everything we're experiencing as a result of this injury, we also are getting a forced re-acquaintance with all the turmoil of the first catastrophe.
When Robb was in the hospital the first time, we experienced an outpouring of support. And the minute he went home, it all ended. I'm not sure if people were sick of hearing about Robb's situation, and had moved on to the Next Thing. Whatever the cause, I was unprepared for how terrible it felt, when people stopped acting as if they cared.
This time, it's like a speeded-up version of that experience. Maybe people have Compassion Fatigue, maybe everyone is busy with other things. Maybe *merely* breaking one's back isn't as big a deal as being paralyzed. Maybe I'm just being overly sensitive.
I'll say this, not for myself, but for everyone else out there:
If you *think* someone is going through a tough time, and could use a little kindness, say something. Don't clam up, because you don't know quite what to say. Your silence is far more hurtful than your clumsiness. If you know someone who is in distress, do something. Even something small.
The smallest gesture is bigger than nothing at all.
Having Robb break his back for the second time is an emotionally complex thing. In addition to everything we're experiencing as a result of this injury, we also are getting a forced re-acquaintance with all the turmoil of the first catastrophe.
When Robb was in the hospital the first time, we experienced an outpouring of support. And the minute he went home, it all ended. I'm not sure if people were sick of hearing about Robb's situation, and had moved on to the Next Thing. Whatever the cause, I was unprepared for how terrible it felt, when people stopped acting as if they cared.
This time, it's like a speeded-up version of that experience. Maybe people have Compassion Fatigue, maybe everyone is busy with other things. Maybe *merely* breaking one's back isn't as big a deal as being paralyzed. Maybe I'm just being overly sensitive.
I'll say this, not for myself, but for everyone else out there:
If you *think* someone is going through a tough time, and could use a little kindness, say something. Don't clam up, because you don't know quite what to say. Your silence is far more hurtful than your clumsiness. If you know someone who is in distress, do something. Even something small.
The smallest gesture is bigger than nothing at all.
Comments
-- Ryan
Beachcomber - Chris Bane
Atlas Quest
Please know that if I were there I'd do ANYTHING, anything right now. I'm also terribly sorry about my silence; we're going through a bit of our own bad stretch here, which has kept me woefully behind in connecting to real humans. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for everything that's been happening this week with you two and wish like mad that there was something I could do to ease your stress and pain. Call anytime. I meant that. Any. Time.
xoxo
g
I want you to know that I check and read your blog everyday. You are both in my prayers. I can't imagine the emotional pain not to mention the physical pain you are both in right now. I know we don't know each other very well, because we've only met a couple of times, but I think you two are some of the most courageous people I've ever met. If there is anything I can do for you please email me. I hope you have a good day today.
JoAnn
Falonator
Wild Rose