How's Lisa
...
I think I'm transitioning from numbness to an overwhelming feeling of sadness. That coupled with the always troubling feeling that we are all ultimately very much alone in this world.
In addition to the emotional turmoil, I've spent way too much energy trying to figure out what to wear to my father's memorial service. He always hated how I tended to dress like I was about to head out the door to a funeral, so I'm really conflicted about my clothing choices. If he hated seeing me dressed in black all the time, would he have hated seeing me dressed for a funeral at his own memorial service? What a brain twister.
I also have no idea what the social mores for French funerals are. I'm uncomfortably aware of this, having shown up in the completely wrong clothes for European weddings on more than one occasion.
Add to that the fact that the stores are in "resort season" and there's not a long sleeve to be found anywhere. Well, that's not entirely true. I've found plenty of trampy trendy clothes, clothes suitable for a cocktail party, or outfits that look like something that Laura Bush might wear. But what's being prominently featured are bathing suits and skimpy tank tops. In February.
I recently read some funeral fashion advice, "As long as you don’t look like a hooker or a hobo, wear what you want. It’s about saying goodbye to someone you loved, not a family fashion show."
And I had to laugh.
I think I'm transitioning from numbness to an overwhelming feeling of sadness. That coupled with the always troubling feeling that we are all ultimately very much alone in this world.
In addition to the emotional turmoil, I've spent way too much energy trying to figure out what to wear to my father's memorial service. He always hated how I tended to dress like I was about to head out the door to a funeral, so I'm really conflicted about my clothing choices. If he hated seeing me dressed in black all the time, would he have hated seeing me dressed for a funeral at his own memorial service? What a brain twister.
I also have no idea what the social mores for French funerals are. I'm uncomfortably aware of this, having shown up in the completely wrong clothes for European weddings on more than one occasion.
Add to that the fact that the stores are in "resort season" and there's not a long sleeve to be found anywhere. Well, that's not entirely true. I've found plenty of trampy trendy clothes, clothes suitable for a cocktail party, or outfits that look like something that Laura Bush might wear. But what's being prominently featured are bathing suits and skimpy tank tops. In February.
I recently read some funeral fashion advice, "As long as you don’t look like a hooker or a hobo, wear what you want. It’s about saying goodbye to someone you loved, not a family fashion show."
And I had to laugh.
Comments
I wonder if everyone goes through the clothes dilemma? I had 2 friends call to ask what I was wearing as well because they had no idea what to do.
Lastly, that's Gorey writing, isn't it?
-Screw
Also, I totally understand about the French and their obsession with wearing the right thing. My mother's side of the family is still this way even after being in the U.S. for quite a few generations now. Luckily Dad's side doesn't care as much (both sides are French though). Have you tried using the internet? There must be a website with DOs and DON'Ts somewhere?
Just dont go dressed for an American Monster Truck Event in some god-awful t-shirt emblazoned with a glow in the dark decal and you will be ok. Or SPECIFICALLY wear one of those t-shirts, and be a trend setter. Just dont expect anyone you know to sit next to you!
Either way, you and your sister are just going to be "the Americans" and you can pretty much expect to not measure up to the locals, and I say why try to? Dress as you wish and go anyway. What you wear is ultimately the last thing you will remember about the funeral.
Just look good and show up, it's sort of like life itself. When are you going, by the way?
By the way what size are you? I have an absoultely fabulous dress from the 1940's that would be appropriate, and perfect for you. I can send it to you if you are range in between a size 1 and 2. I think you and I are built the same, so it should fit ok.
Annalisa
~~Doublesaj~~
Unrelatedly I found this website today and immediately thought of you guys, especially Robb. I imagine you know all these tips and tricks already but maybe you'll find it useful or maybe you have something to share. It's a compendium of tips and tricks from people with spinal cord injuries:
http://www.spinalistips.se/
My thoughts are with you and yours...
Those boots are awesome BTW.
-many hugs-
On the other hand, I hear the "hobo hooker look" is considered tres chic in Paris this spring. LOL.
I do agree with the above poster about comfy shoes! You may be on your feet for a while.
Suzi